The message on the phone said, "Dr. Schuchardt... I'm calling because I'm having trouble with my bowels -- I mean VOWELS. I was wondering if you had any herbs -- I mean VERBS -- to recommend. Also, the fluidity of my nose -- I mean PROSE -- wait, just what kind of doctor are you anyway?" Turns out it was my sister-in-law, congratulating me on the completion of a ten-year odyssey in graduate school. Officially it's a Doctor of Philosophy, a Ph.D. in Media Ecology from NYU, and it's finally over thanks to this week's successful defense of my dissertation on the medieval genealogy of much of American corporate symbolism and iconography. Metaphilm readers are to be thanked for their ongoing patience with the site while this was going on -- you can expect more regular content updates from now on, and a big announcement early this summer of something both new and exciting at Metaphilm.