Watching Walt Disney’s Money Presents: Pirates of Disneyworld—the Curse of Hans Zimmer was like watching other people participate in a ride based on someone else’s writings of experiences that they had, at some point, heard about still other people having.
Not that I expected anything different. It’s just a staggering experience all around. Amid the flair and the special effects and the blaring music competing with actors’ screaming competing with Foley artists’ pet explosions there are moments when you can suddenly see right through it all, the phrase “No Hay Banda” flashes through your mind, and you realize that you, quite literally, are time-traveling back before the Fall, back before language and the birth of Ideaspace, back into the Void itself. It’s Nietzsche’s Abyss, and it is staring back at you and grinning with real gold teeth, implanted on actors for the sacred end of Authenticity.
And then you realize that this is what it’s like living in post-history. This film is not unique. It might not even be the best example, just the most current. This is the logical progression of Pastiche: the painstakingly detailed, expertly photographed, complete and utter recreation of the hallucination of History in the context of capitalistic entertainment.
And as I drove home, numb and confused and questioning my very existence, I realized that I would be eagerly anticipating the ride based on this film. I hoped it would be everything I was coming to expect from movies based on rides based on movies; but only because I wanted the sequel film based on the sequel ride to be as good as the original.